It’s Thanksgiving, cue the round-robin sharing of gratefulness around the dinner table. Together with family or friends, you get the opportunity to think about what you appreciate and give it a voice. Apart from that day, how often do you think about what you’re grateful for? Is it a passing thought or a routine practice? Do you tend to focus on the challenges of the day or the small graces?
If you could improve your personal and social life dramatically by regularly practicing gratitude, would you do it? Research shows not only that people can intentionally foster thankfulness, but that there are many social, emotional, and personal benefits to deliberately adopting an attitude of gratitude.
What is Gratitude
Gratitude is defined as the state or quality of being thankful; readiness to show appreciation for and to return kindness. It can be an emotion, mood, personality trait, or feeling. While the feeling of thankfulness may be spontaneous, the practice of gratitude can be routine.
You can practice thankfulness for people, places, opportunities, things, or life in general. The emotion generates an internal positivity with the potential to extend outward.
What makes a person grateful?
The level of gratefulness obviously depends on the person. We all vary in experiences and preferences, which influences how we express gratefulness. Some people are grateful for “simple” things like rain because it provides needed nourishment or because it washes everything clean. Other people are grateful for extraordinary experiences because they rarely happen. Others still find gratitude for participation in specific actions, like helping others, because the interaction and assistance provide meaning or goodwill.
Benefits of Gratitude
Psychologists assert that regular gratitude practice boosts happiness and improves health. While thankfulness can have immediate impact, lasting benefits take time.
“Gratitude writing can be beneficial not just for healthy, well-adjusted individuals, but also for those who struggle with mental health concerns. In fact, it seems, practicing gratitude on top of receiving psychological counseling carries greater benefits than counseling alone, even when that gratitude practice is brief.”
How Gratitude Changes your brain
According to one study, practicing gratitude can positively change your brain. When people felt more grateful, their brain activity was distinct from brain activity related to guilt and the desire to help a cause which suggests that people who are more grateful are also more attentive to how they express thankfulness.
Routine practice or focus on thankfulness can greatly benefit the person, but can also have a larger societal impact.
Personal benefits
Being grateful shifts attention away from the negative emotions which can improve depression, boost moods, and provide greater satisfaction in life. Gratitude can help you feel better about circumstances which can then lead to higher self-esteem.
Gratitude has many personal benefits including:
- Increased levels of happiness/positive mood
- Greater satisfaction and purpose in life
- A more balanced approach to life (and less likely to experience burnout)
- Potential for better physical health and sleep
- Greater resiliency and perseverance
- Developed patience, humility, and wisdom
Regular thankfulness practices have proven to also reduce stress. Gratitude helps even if you don’t directly share it with anyone. Taking the time to reflect and appreciate experiences, people, and things can enhance overall happiness by 10 percent.
Routine gratitude practice can also affect personalities. The regular “attitude of gratitude” can increase optimism, spirituality, and selflessness. This is because looking at the bright side creates a momentum shift. The more you think about what you’re grateful for, the more we find things to be grateful for—the power of positive thinking!
Societal benefits
While gratitude is personal, it is also a social emotion. When we express gratitude towards others, the benefits can be compounded regardless of whether it is reciprocated by others.
Gratitude is a gift of “paying it forward”. When we express gratefulness to others, it is often a trigger for someone else’s moment of gratefulness.
Showing gratefulness can make us feel good, make others feel good, and improve interactions. People who regularly practice thankfulness are more likely to work though problems and concerns with people in their lives. Some societal benefits of regular thankfulness are:
- Increased prosocial behaviors
- Strengthened relationships (ncluding romantic relationships)
- Improved employee effectiveness
- Increased job satisfaction
Gratitude can benefit the workplace too. Surely the personal and social benefits can carry over to the workplace or other communities. Specifically, gratitude can make us more effective managers by increasing motivational abilities, reducing impatience, and promoting teambuilding and respectful relationships. These combined practices can also help people reduce stress and find meaning in their work and workplace.
How to Practice Gratitude
Gratitude starts with noticing the goodness in life. Instead of cynicism, try adopting an appreciative view of life to put yourself in a more thankful mindset. This is obviously easier said than done, but start small.
It’s okay to start with being unhappy or nervous or anxious. But try to figure out what could move you from that negative (victim-like) place and into a place of gratefulness. This could be having a set amount of time or time of day for worry, journaling in the morning or evening, or having quiet reflection time each day to meditate on gratitude.
When I first tried a gratitude practice, I had difficulty moving past anger or disappointment to thankfulness. I would time my “freak outs” to 5 minutes. I had a set amount of time where I could worry, cry, scream, or be upset in whatever way felt good in the moment. Then, when the timer went off, I’d try to find at least one good thing about the moment.
Reframing the tough moment as a gift could be a place for you to start. For example, if you have a tough decision to make, recognize the difficulties and then try to see it as an opportunity for growth or change.
Prompts to help foster gratitude
- Keep a journal or phone note to record an ongoing list of the joys of daily life (big and small)
- Before breakfast or dinner, share something you’re thankful for every day
- Write down “three good things” every day to develop a mindset and habit of gratitude
- Write thank-you notes for experiences, conversations, memories, and gifts
- Think about people who have inspired you and what about them was most significant
- Engage in “mental subtraction.” Like the ghosts in A Christmas Carol, imagine what your life would be like if some positive event had not occurred
- Add giving thanks to your evening routine. While you’re brushing your teeth, consider all of the things you are grateful for that day
- Challenge yourself to come up with a new gratitude every day for 30 days straight (no repeats!)
Conclusion
There are many social and personal benefits to deliberately adopting an attitude of gratitude. A regular gratitude practice can improve moods, strengthen relationships, and create meaning and balance. Like with other habits, start small and intentionally with thanksgiving. Reframe tough times as a type of opportunity or set a calendar reminder for gratitude writing every morning.
Regardless of your circumstances, you can practice gratitude. At my first job, I had few resources, tough days and an even more difficult boss. I would complain to my mentor every single day. After a few weeks of daily negativity, my mentor told me that she wouldn’t listen to me—that I wasn’t welcome in her office—until I talked about something good that happened that day. One day, turned into a week, turned into a month, turned into a daily gratefulness practice of nearly a decade. How can you incorporate thanksgiving into your routine today? Let me know! xoxo Mo
